Monday, April 21, 2008

To Spank or Not to Spank your Deaf Child?


(Note: Interesting what you find when googling photos for spanking) I have no time to blog, this post will be short and to the point. To Spank your disobedient child or not to Spank your disobedient child? And by spank, I do not mean a "spank" given by an angry out of control parent, I mean a "spank" consciously given to teach a child right from wrong. When Jordan was about 6, after having exercised every other type of "punishment" imaginable including positive reinforcement strategies, time-out, etc. the spanks started coming...and they worked. What do you think?? The American mentality is very different from the Italian mentality in this area as American parents may fear Social Services intervening at the drop of a well-planted smack on the arse! Just curious...Hugs from Italy...very freaking busy!

Adding...
Live on the Blog with siblings, Mavi (12) and Federico (13 1/2):
Question: What do you think about "Spanking" children?

Mavi: My parents rarely spanked me when I was younger, and I think it helped me learn the lesson at the time. However, it isn't the most important tool in helping children "learn the lesson," it is more important to talk to the child.

Federico: My parents always spanked me when I was younger, and I still get slapped on occasion when I open a big mouth! (lol-me) Spanking is very useful because you learn how to obey your parents. At first, spanking may seem like a terrible punishment, but as you grow up, you can understand the value of a quality smack on the butt.

Question: Will you "spank" your children?

Mavi: Yes, if it's the only way to help my child understand right from wrong.

Federico: Yes, and then, I will tell them about the moments I was spanked by my parents.


PS. "Bubbly" is dedicated to little Christian who's going in for ci surgery today at Hopkins...kisses to Christina and Chuck!!!

12 comments:

Karen Mayes said...

Oh, yes, I did spank my kids' butts. Now they are older, I use "taking away privileges" and "earning privileges back" methods. Sometimes timeouts, work... especially when I use them at friends' houses where they don't want to be embarrassed ;o)

I used my hand... not a brush, nor a belt, nor a wooden spoon, whathaveyou.

Candy said...

In America many parents do not spank their kids compared to 20 years ago. Look at America's kids now and look back 20 years. There's your answer.

Divided said...

good answer Candy!! nothing like a good old fashioned "smack" when the kid doesn't respond to parents as told. of course, time out or taking privileges away as the kid is older is also effective. key is consistency and both parents must agree on the punishment!!!

Jodi Cutler Del Dottore said...

Candy,
Likin' that response! Interesting...Jodi

Rachel said...

I'm one of them who was spanked by my mother a few times when I was a little tot! I was just a plain difficult child...

Val said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Abbie said...

I can think of one time my mom walloped me but I don't remember getting spanked...

Naomi said...

oh yes, same here Down Under Karen, spanks when they were very young, loss of privileges/gaining them back when they are older.

I could count on both hands the number of times I had to spank my two!

I too can remember once or twice being spanked by my father and yep I knew exactly what it was that I did to warrant it too : - )

Val said...

I popped B(4.5 yrs old) on the butt once yesterday (didn't hurt at all but broke her heart)...why? Because after weeks of displaying her middle finger to strangers down the road, her teacher, etc. and she KNOWS it's inappropriate...we've placed her in time out each time which is usually effective w/other stuff...but when I picked Gage up from school yesterday, I happen to glance in the backseat to catch her proudly holding her finger up to ALL THE TEACHERS AND KIDS at the elementary school as we drove past...front and center. I made her wait in her room for me for like five minutes before I came in...she was so "tore up" crying her eyes out, after our talk I barely popped her butt and she remained in her room sobbing for like five minutes. Then it was over! Let's hope it works! Even Gage was very upset w/her...go figure!

Lisa C. said...

I had been spanked by my mom several times. I was always getting into trouble because I can't hear and was very frustrated due to lack of communication.
One day I was spanked for showing my middle finger to one of my brothers and his friend. Several hours later I asked "Mommy, what was it?" pointing my left finger to my right middle finger. She explained it to me and was saying that she was sorry for spanking me without asking me if I knew what it was.
I spanked my 2 hearing sons with my hand much less often than my mom did to me because we were able to communicate well with ASL.

Jodi Cutler Del Dottore said...

Lisa C.,
Thanks for your comment, this was the most relevant comment in regard to deafness. I've done what your mom did and realized that my son had done something unaware, because of mixed communication issues. Felt like shit after the unwarranted spank and tried to learn from it...

Laurie said...

My pastor once said that God put "padding" on rear ends for a reason. . .use it!

As a deaf child, I was spanked because it was one of the only ways my parents could get my attention. Later, they were able to reason and explain why they were punishing me and spanking wasn't always necessary. Just the fact that I disappointed my parents hurt worse than the spanking itself!