Sunday, April 29, 2012

Blind Faith

Have you ever been so swept away that you kind of take a leave of absence to experience a different type of reality only to have something happen that slams your feet right back on the ground?
That happened.
And what I discovered was that my feet have always been on the ground and that the ground is still there. a powerful sensation.

When you try to begin a relationship at age 40, both of you have baggage. So, when confronting an unpleasant or unexpected situation that springs itself upon you unexpectedly, it's logical that your reaction is based on that baggage.
I did a lot of work at the end of my marriage trying to figure out who I am and what I'm all about.
Going through that process can be painful, but if you do it in an honest way, if you live your life in an honest one can touch you. No one can try to turn you into a victim.
The only person who can allow yourself to be a victim is you.

Anyway, life's little moments or setbacks can oftentimes offer great insight to how far you've progressed on that road that you chose, even when you had no idea in what direction you were heading.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Popcorn...just because

Sometimes, living my life is like watching a film. Or maybe I get that feeling when I write about it.
And it's been a while since I've checked in.

Jordan went on a class trip by plane to Sicily for four days-three nights.
He survived, returned with gifts for all and a bunch of amazing pix, but some of the moments weren't so easy for him.
Full-blown adolescence has struck our home.
I'm dealing with one minute- Mom, I need you and the next minute Mom, get out of my room I want to be alone. I'm schizophrenic enough as it is without the added confusion.
He needs to react, but the ability to react to a given situation must come from within. I can help, but I am limited.
Tug-o-war moment between Jordan and himself typical of what your average 15 year hormonal teen goes through, only I was the female version and can never seem to find the words that heal or help.

I don't do impotence very well. But I'm trying.

Sofia is growing up as only Sofia does. The other day my friend whose daughter is best friends with Sofia, told me they were walking in the center of our small town, when an old man yelled to Sofia's friend, "There goes the little girl with the high heels!"
Sofia replied, "Look there's the old man with the dentures!"
Needless to say, I was happy I was not present at that precise moment.
She's currently working on a Math problem regarding meters, kilometers, etc and she asked me for help. I flunked the metric system in Elementary School:-)

I'm trying to balance kids, work and love...because as I am learning...I need love in my life.
As far as that goes, he's introducing me to a lot of first times like motorcycle rides, real coconuts, etc - the other day he surprised me with a bag filled with a sandwich-toaster toaster and the thing that swirls around to dry the lettuce for your salad, so it doesn't get soggy.

I believe he's trying to domesticate me:-)

Two HUGE congresses are up-and-coming...the FCEI in Austria and the NHS 2012 in Cernobbio, Lake Como...preparing presentations for both and so, so excited to see the GPOD- once upon a time, a long time ago, we had a talk under a tree and believed that the system should listen to parents.
The system is listening....