Wednesday, January 21, 2009

No More Miss Nice Girl

I will be sweet. I will be available to help, create, assist, motivate, plan, direct and advise you...but please, please do not piss me off. I have never been a person to sit waiting on the defensive, unless that is the best strategy for a given situation. I will work for free as long as I am respected and appreciated. I will wait...and I will be patient.

*Until a mother asks me for help and I am placed in a situation where I am unable to give it*

Then, I am forced to hop over to the offensive side of the fence. A mother contacted me the other day. I have no idea how she found my number. She has a seventeen month old deaf baby girl. Her audiologist is the same as the audiologist who first diagnosed Jordan. Her daughter currently wears hearing aids. This audiologist does not believe in cochlear implants or sign language. I'm sure she has her reasons. This mother began doing some research in her free time. Note: she is divorced and works at a fast food restaurant.

As opposed to the mother in DENIAL, this mother told me about how she saw a child with hearing aids walk into her workplace, and that she asked to go on break to sit and talk to the mother of this child. She tried to convince the mother of this child to create an association so that she could be in contact with other deaf children just like her daughter.

She called me and we began to talk. She called in the middle of Jordan and company's English lesson, so I asked her if she wanted to talk to Jordan. She started to say, "No..that's okay." I handed Jordan the phone. He talked for about five minutes and if I had difficulty understanding her on the phone, you can imagine Jordan. When he handed me back the phone, this woman was crying.

*If a mother cries after talking to my son, I will draw blood for her*

I told her I would contact the necessary people, so that she could have a consultation to see whether her child could potentially be a candidate. I explained that the cochlear implant is just like the hearing aid, you must be in speech therapy and work on language- no difference. She said she had never heard a deaf child or adult speak and that she is ready to work.

We spoke again later that night and this morning. She said that when she had tried to make an appointment with the ci department, she always received an answering machine. She asked me for help.

Do you think it's easy to ask for help? Do you think it's easy to trust people with your child's information and life history? How about your emotions?

No, I can't save the world...but I can hold her hand.

PS. I MUST have one of those hats!


Anonymous said...

Man! Wow! You're such an incredible advocate for these new parents! Keep on going!

Don't you LOVE that hat? It's definitely the hottest fashion item I saw yesterday on the television!

I'm still celebrating!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

You're born for this and kudos to the mother for finding you AND your phone number! :) What did she and Jordan talk about?

Unknown said...

I don't think she talked, she just listened. He told her about his life...btw, a halfer is when only one of you feels that you are in a relationship *smile*
Rachel...I can tell that you are still celebrating!! How 'bout your campaigning mommy??

Debbie said...

Go girl! Gettin it done. It does seem incredible -- once you've been through the experiences yourself there is a passion to walking others through it, as I'm sure someone did for you. Our bond as Mom's of special kids can be stronger than some of the closest friends we've known forever.

Thanks for checking in on us. Oh, and by the by --LOVE, did I mention LOVE, the Simone Poli story. How freakin funny is that. You had me laughing my tush off.

Christian and Lily's Mommy said...

Another reason why I call you my guru.