Wednesday, November 9, 2011

40 is beautiful week starts now

Let the countdown begin.
T minus 7 days until I become four-oh.
Sofia came home from school with an A+ in Math and an A+ in Italian.
Jordan came home with an A in English and a D in Graphic Design.
Sofia excels in everything she does and smiles and giggles.
Jordan is a homebody and hugs me a lot.

I worry about Jordan. He's a boy and I do not have boy experiences, actually I'm quite a disaster at understanding all males. He's at that age where he probably would want to do a lot of things like go out Saturday night with friends or hang out with girls, but the complicated situation in his high school class is not giving him the opportunity to grow socially. I've asked him if he wants to change sections or even schools, but academically he feels comfortable, so he isn't willing to risk that sense of security to wade in unknown territory. I can't make that choice for him...yet. The best I can do right now is let him know I understand his situation and that I am ready to make the change when he is.

He comes home from school serene, which makes me think things aren't too bad, but if I compare my high school life to his, and I was no party animal...I had fun and he is not having fun.

40 allows you to take all the experience baggage you've lived and apply it to your kids.
At 40 you've learned the difference between yes and no, right and wrong, child and adult.
I used to want to be 21 forever.
But 40....40 seems to me like the first half of my life is over and I have a new starting line.
I get to take everything I've learned in the past forty years and use it as the woman I have become...to kick some ass for the next forty years.
I will say this: I don't care if there's a lil more jiggle in my ass or that gravity has taken effect after giving birth to two kids, because there's a helluva lot more strut in my step and a femininity in the way I cross my legs that 21 never imagined existed.

6 comments:

Julia said...

Another nice perk of being forty is that it's a great qualifier. I've never been happy about certain parts of my figure (like everyone else). When you're twenty-five and you have a suboptimal body feature, it bites. But when you're forty, you can say, "Hey, that's actually pretty good, for forty!" And it's true. I wouldn't win any beauty pageants for 25-year-olds, but I'm pretty hot -- for forty! I find it strangely comforting.

Debbi said...

I like what Julia said! So true.
I hear what you are saying about Jordan...Ian's not having fun and I can't seem to fix it. He doesn't want me to fix it either. But it eats me alive some days.
My husband says I have much more of a problem with it than Ian does. I know this is true...but I just want to see happy...not just serene. There's a lot of the angry teen evidenced...I don't see a lot of the euphorically happy teen that should offset the dark side.
Parents can't fix everything. Damnit!!! I want to fix everything!!!
Hang in there. 40 is what I look back at as one of the happiest times. 55...now that was a show stopper - uh, how did that happen - kind of day!
Love you!

Debbie said...

You are awesome lady! LOVE this post. 40 is....what it is! There's very little you can do change it. Time marches on and we are moving with it -- with swagger!!!! I know what you're talking about with Jordan, we had that with Nestor's son. If it makes you feel any better -- college was more fun for him. We've always said that "he's a late bloomer". Just as you've taken 40 years to find your swagger...Jordan will too. Hopefully sooner than later, but he will! He has a Mom with a huge personality, it may take him a little longer.

Anonymous said...

Lol, I think Jordan's waiting for his sophmoristic high school years to be over with, so he'll probably look forward to the day he'll be on his own, either in college or on his very first 'money-earning' job.

Graduation from high school was no biggie for me, but I blossomed when I entered college. It's a much bigger world out there and I loved the traveling/stretching it provided me.

Ah yes, that 4-0. That's when you still have some physical/sexual draw, but the mental stamina and character definition start to kick in at this age. You're only starting the ride, girl. Enjoy it!

Ann_C

Dianrez said...

It's true that with seniority comes privilege. Not only can you kick ass better, you can do it with authority and make it stick more often. It's also a time to show the kids that life does get better as one gets older and there's really no way to hurry it up for the benefit of their generation.

Jodi Michelle Cutler said...

Julia...it is comforting and I totally agree, but I believe it's a mental thing that is directly related to the physical thing. Somehow all the mental shit fades...and we're just better.
Debbie,- you are pregnant and fabulous at forty...interesting abotu Nestor's son, thank you..
Debbi- Happy and not just serene...is it asking for too much? I want to fix it all too...at least you can make it work in the kitchen:-D
Ann- it's been a while:-)...mental draw is what we're working with here:-)
Dianrez...love you xoxo...improving with age:-)
Thank you all...